Yikes! Only A Year Left! *OR* Stop The Blog, I Want To Get Off

First off, Happy St. Patrick's Day. When we all celebrate our ability to look good in green, eat corned beef and cabbage, and somehow go back to our Irish roots.

Of course to do so, we must do the most stereotypical Irish accent we can think of and "pretend" to be drunk all day. And eat potatoes. And wear big sweaters. Gee, great day Irish, let's try a little harder. At least with Cinco De Mayo we get to light off fireworks. All we get with St. Patrick's Day is a river dyed green. Nice effort Chicago.

 It being St. Patrick's Day of 2011, the official countdown has begun (note new countdown thing on the right). We're only a year away from the wedding of the "holiday." B and Corrin have 366 days (2012 is a leap year) to get their act together and throw us one heck of a party. I don't go out to Paso Robles for anything.

Of course, what really matters is that I only have one more year to keep this pathetic little blog afloat. I figure if I aim for about 2 posts per week, I still have way too many posts to think of. Sigh. How does this affect you? Well, if you come here for entertainment, you may start to be horribly disappointed (this is where you act like you aren't already). Gads, we're going to have to think of more destinations and themes. Maybe we'll try to dress B up in funny costumes for the wedding. There is still some planning for bachelor parties to complete.

But as I was listening to a few songs, I thought maybe I should come up with a real gift. I know what you are thinking:
"What, another gift? Hey, they should be giving you a gift for all the blogging that you do."

No argument here.
But for some family, I have performed a song or two at either a wedding, a shower, or a reception. Typically, one is sappy and cute. And then the other is somewhat amusing. Oh, and I am by no means a talented musician.

I'm playing the mandolin, in case you care. The bigger guys are my brothers-in-law

I came across a Johnny Cash song that might fit the bill for one of them. Comment here if you think you know the song. Or if you have other ideas.

Here's to 366 more days!

Being Mr. Mom

Once you are married and are starting your family, you have to plan for little Carl, when he arrives. Carl, of course, being the name of your first child, as we have established in previous posts. I am now an expert in parenting with over 2 months of experience, so I feel I have a lot to add.

I have been baby-sitting (or as it should be called, just being dad) a bunch lately while my wife is off working. I get to be Mr. Mom.



No, not the 1983 movie featuring Michael Keaton, who went on to play Batman. But a real-life stay at home dad struggling with the day to day activities that a 2 month old boy needs. The breast-feeding is the worst, I don't think he is getting anything from me (that's a joke, I've got plenty).

So here are some tips for B when he has to take care of Carl while Corrin is out making the big bucks or doing some great community service (that last one was actually sincere folks. Rare on this blog).

• Sleep when you can.
• Be patient. Carl is going to take you to your very last nerve.
• Let the house go. Become a hoarder and get a TLC show.
• Take the kid to the park and the store- those are great places to pick up on women. And what woos a woman more than a baby?
• Dress Carl up in his favorite Johnny Cash shirt. He looks awesome!

• Don't leave Carl alone with the baby powder. 

I'm sure I have other tips. But again, this blog has been half-assed today. Sorry, I've been a bit busy today. Enjoy your day anyways, now that I've ruined it by not giving you the humor you were expecting.

I'm Johnny Cash

That picture has nothing to do with the wedding, I just love that shot.

First, a Shout-Out To Our Followers. Hi Shap & Corrin! Now, on with the blog.

"I keep a close watch on this heart of mine, I keep my eyes wide open all the time...Because you're mine, I'd walk the line."

I have mentioned some themes for the wedding before. I think I have struck gold with my most recent idea, a Man In Black wedding. You won't get the "Cocaine Blues" while "Walk[ing] The Line" at this wedding. Nope, your love will burn like a "Ring Of Fire." We aren't talking about "A Boy Named Sue," just a boy named B marrying his June Carter, Corrin. "Delia" won't be gone when B is standing at the alter as a "Man In Black" Sure, the crowd will be thinking there is just "25 Minutes To Go" until the end of the wedding, but we will all just "Cry, Cry. Cry" as you are announced for the first time as man and wife. And Corrin, maybe B will "Tremble For You" later that evening. But B, Corrin will return the favor and show you "The Ways Of A Woman In Love." Look how happy you will be

The rest of us can just mope around in black while you are all happy. You can call me a "Dirty Old Egg-Suckin' Dog," but I think you know I am on to something here! Babies love him.

He's even got something for the kids: