Would You Like Fries With That?

Previously I had suggested that B and Corrin get married at McDonald's. It seems so easy and so...rednecky. This is not to say that B or Corrin is rednecky at all. And are we all impressed that I have been able to use the made-up word "rednecky" in three consecutive sentences? We should be!

It seems that a place that I would not consider rednecky (#4 for those counting) has jumped all over my idea and McDonald's is trying to make it fashionable. Hong Kong, one of the most diverse locations in the world, a veritable melting pot of culture has lost all sense of culture. Sorry Hong Kong, I never got to visit before you went downhill. The kids are flocking to the golden arches to start their new lives as husband and wife and trans-fat. Wait, do they use trans-fat? Honestly, the last time I ate anything other than ice cream at a McDonald's was probably in 1999. So the kids are going to their local fast food joint and getting hitched. Look at the fun you can have. You can reenact your favorite "Lady & The Tramp" scene

But insert a french fry for a noodle, like this couple

Cute? And guess what Corrin, searching through magazines and store racks is over for you! McDonald's will take care of your dress as well. Just look at what these lovely ladies are wearing down between the tables and screaming children:

Yup, those are balloon dresses. Probably means you won't be sitting down, but sure makes the honeymoon interesting. And you won't have to wonder what to do with the dress when you are done, just hand it off to some guy on the street to make balloon Transformers. I prefer old-school Optimus Prime:

So now you're thinking "I have a great location. I've got the perfect dress. I've got most of the food covered. What about the cake?" Oh, they've got you covered there too.

A cake made of apple pie boxes. My guess is that there are apple pies in there, but I just can't say for sure. Look, I like apple pie, but really? This seems lazy even for McDonald's.

I understand if you have other plans for the actual wedding location, but you are in luck. They will do engagement parties and anniversaries. Now, if we could only get either Hofbrau

or Jocko's to do the same, we would be in luck.