Triplets!

Brent Lee, future father? I think this needs to happen, and soon. But why only have one kid at a time when you can knock out an entire brood in one swoop? Pop yourself full of fertility drugs and get yourself a multiple birth and a show on TLC all at the same time. This way you can get paid to have the kids and you never have to take pictures since every moment will be caught on tape anyway. Of course the track record for those families isn't great, so on second thought, don't do that.

Triplets need great names and here they are. For boys they will be named:
Abernathy
Bernard
Carl
(see the ABC thing? Yup, that's on purpose)

If they are girls, you may use:
Agnes
Bertha
Carl
(I love the name Carl)

Let's review the benefits of triplets:

• Only have to give birth once
• Only have to be pregnant once
• How many triplets do you know?
• One in three chance your kid will be named Carl
• One really big baby shower
• Those Buy One Get One offers really start to pay off
• Get a cool three-person stroller. Latch it to the back of the Tahoe.
• Did we already talk about how cool the name Carl is? In fact, go the George Foreman route and name them all Carl.
• You can fleece those restaurants where kids eat free.
• They can just babysit each other

Now, I'm not saying you have to have them right away. Enjoy a little time as a married couple first. But then do the world a favor and bring us a Carl and two other kids.