In the time honored wedding tradition there comes the opportunity to laugh and "oooh" as a crowd. I'm not talking about the wedding dress, but the flower girl and the ring bearer. Seemingly unimportant jobs, the parents take a lot of responsibility to make sure that their children are the stars of the show. Really, they are trying to upstage the bride and groom. And honestly, how dare they! This is not their show, why don't they just back off and let the light shine fully where it was intended?
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| Doesn't she know that those shoes don't go with that dress? |
But let me help and give your potential flower girl or ring bearer some advice. Parents, bring your kid right up to the monitor and help them read these valuable tips.
Flower Girls:
- Even flower distribution is key. Don't clump.
- Don't eat the flowers, they are not candy.
- Let's make decent time down the aisle, don't doddle.
- At the same time, don't run down the aisle. Unless, of course, there is a fire.
- Be cute, but not too cute. This ain't your show.
- Once you have strewn flowers about, fade into the shadows. Like Batman.
- Don't wave to your parents. They see you. So does everyone else.
- Don't mess it up. You could easily ruin the wedding with your shenanigans.
Ring Bearers:
- Don't eat the ring. Have you seen what hospitals charge?
- The pillow should be kept horizontal in two hands. This isn't a football and you aren't Reggie Bush.
- Pee before the wedding. It is a lot of clothes to take off in an emergency.
- Again, don't run but don't doddle.
- You probably aren't as cute as the flower girl. Get used to it.
- If you want to earn cute points, dance with the flower girl at the reception and then give her a kiss. Everyone will think this is adorable. You will be praised for being a mack-daddy.
- That ring is more expensive than your life. Guess which one people are going to try to save. Just keep that in mind.
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